I will never forget one winter day in 2010. Nothing spectacular happened; it was just an ordinary day. The kids were in and out because of the fresh snow. I spent all morning getting the kids dressed in all the snow apparel and wiping the floor clean of the snow they and the dog had dragged in. I was so frustrated by the afternoon that I called my husband at work and said, “That’s it, I’m done. We can move south”. He had wanted to move out of the Northeast for a while, but I did not want to. I felt at home in this area; I knew what to expect, as it was familiar, and my family was nearby.
The Lord opened doors, and my husband found a new job in Texas. The job required him to relocate in early June, so he went ahead of us. Once the school year ended and we sold the house, the kids and I would follow. Like anyone who has moved, especially a long distance, it is better to clean out as much garbage as possible before the move, so the load is lighter, and you don’t have as much to unpack. As I was cleaning and preparing for the movers, it became apparent that we had accumulated a fair number of things that we no longer needed, benefited us, or simply no longer wanted. Someone needed to take some stuff to the dump. That someone was me, and I was not looking forward to that. It was a task that my husband had always handled, but now the job was mine. After much encouragement and hem-hawing, I finally loaded up the minivan and made a trip to the local dump. I backed the van up to a large container and got out to unload all my no longer needed treasures. I took the first item out and threw it into the container. It felt as if each time I threw something away, I lifted a weight off my shoulders. I couldn’t wait to get to the van and throw out the rest of the items. There were several trips to the dump that day and in the days that followed. With each trip, I felt lighter; it was a liberating experience that I can’t really explain, just one that I experienced. Since then, there have been many trips to the dump, and occasionally, a dumpster has been brought into the driveway to dispose of items.
Not once in all these years have I looked back and thought, ‘Oh, maybe I need that,’ or gone back and tried to retrieve something from the trash. I was glad to be rid of material objects that were no longer serving a purpose or holding me back, as I had clutter that I did not need. As I was walking one morning, the memory of this time came to mind. I thought, Why, when I have given things over to God, do I go back and take them back? The things I take back may be personal, emotional, or spiritual thoughts or behaviors that I need to release, but I hold onto them. If I do give them over to God, I usually try to reclaim them. I ask myself, “Why can’t I leave them at the foot of the cross and walk away unburdened and live in freedom and the joy that comes. One reason I go back and take things I have left is because, on some level, I want to be in control of my own life. I think I know how to handle this, or I don’t need God to handle this.
On the other hand, it may be because I don’t fully trust God to handle it, especially in his time, not mine. When God does not move the way I want or in the time frame I have in my mind, I may think, “Oh, forget it, I will take care of it”. Psalm 37:5 tells us, “Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act”. This verse is a beautiful promise that if we surrender and trust the Almighty God, he will act. He won’t always act the way we want or in our time, but the promise stands that he will act. As long as we live, we will always need to clean out areas of our lives. Just as I left the dump and went home to find more items to discard, I can continually examine my life and invite the Holy Spirit to reveal the areas I need to surrender to walk in the freedom made possible through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Each time I let go of something, I can return to the Spirit again, asking Him to search me more deeply and uncover anything else that weighs me down. Psalm 139:23-24 speaks to the wisdom of going to God for renewal: “Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts. And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way of understanding.” This ongoing process of release and renewal leads to true freedom—a lightness of soul that is only possible because of Christ’s finished work on the cross.
God tells us in 1 Peter 5:7 to “humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him because he cares for you”. The act of casting implies throwing something into God’s care and surrendering control. The beautiful part is the promise that God cares for us when we are vulnerable and surrender to Him. Another great verse is Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” What a significant message to come to Jesus and lay your burdens down. Again, Jesus promises us something if we are faithful in coming to Him: rest and peace. Also, we can live in freedom from carrying burdens by ourselves. As we take his yoke on us, Jesus shares the burden, making the task and work easier. We are never alone, and by surrendering to God, we can walk away lighter, freer, and better equipped to be a witness to the world around us.
After we arrived in Texas and unpacked all the boxes, I realized that I needed to buy a few things to make our home feel like home. When we leave our burdens and cares at the foot of the cross and walk away, we must ask the Holy Spirit to fill up those spaces with new attitudes, behaviors, and actions that honor and glorify God. First, we must search our hearts and ask the Holy Spirit to show us what we need to surrender to him so that we can grow and flourish, and then rely on the Spirit to help us walk and walk in obedience, trusting His strength to transform us day by day in the likeness of Christ.
Surrendering completely to God invites us into a life of freedom—resting in the assurance that He is working all things for His glory and our good. Sometimes that means letting go of what is old so that He can bring forth something new and life-giving. And when we feel unsure of how to release what burdens us, we can turn to the Holy Spirit, who gently guides, strengthens, and renews us.
I encourage you, through the Spirit, to take an inventory of what you no longer need and to have the courage and boldness to cast it all on Jesus, walking in the freedom He so graciously offers.
Peace in the Desert 